An emotional check up

So last week marked my 19 week check up and things got a little emotional as they can during pregnancy. I didn’t have W by my side this time to stop the on-flux of tears that soon came but I got through and when I met him at the airport the tears started to flow and flowed more once we go home.

So first the good news. I of course had a list of questions and luckily was able to manage Butters and my niece long enough to get them all answered. First thing are the results of the quad screen all came back negative. So what does this mean in normal terms? Basically that the indicators that they can check for in my blood that would show possible downs syndrome, spinal defects and other chromosomal abnormalities. All the results for me were negative so no worries on that end. Also I need to add that my ob operates on a no news is good news philosophy. So if something had of come up positive I would have known before yesterday but I wanted to ask anyway.

There was the first question regarding if I was feeling any movement and that was a definite yes. Some days it more like a ball pushing out on the right side of my abdomen more than anything, but there is defiantly movement there! Also this kid is pretty low so many times the movement is centered on my sciatic nerve in my back or bladder! But either way I and W have been able to feel quite a bit of movement which is reassuring many days!

The next question was regarding the much more prevalent cramping and pressure I’ve been experiencing with this one. He assured me it was a normal thing to happen with the second and not to be alarmed unless they turn into contractions.

The final question that I had was about scheduling my next appointment. He won’t do the gender screen until 22 weeks exactly so I wanted to schedule the appointment for that week so that Mac could still be here to see for herself. He said that was fine and we will hopefully be finding out the gender on June 30th. I am very excited to finally have a day set!

The last thing that actually happened at the first of my visit was my weight gain. When I went back I stepped on the scale and it said 134lbs. This is up 9 total pounds in 19.5 weeks and the nurse said something along the lines of wow you’ve gained a lot of weight. Now most people know that my weight is a fairly sensitive issue so when she said this it killed me. We went back to the room and took my blood pressure (didn’t get the exact reading but it was around what it normally is) and the heartbeat which was in the upper 140’s to 150’s which was fine. She measured me and for about 19.5 weeks I was measuring 22 weeks so that should say something right there. The nurse asked about my diet and I assured her that I wasn’t eating huge portions and nothing out of the normal. I exercise as much as I can and stay active. I actually only have small cravings for junk food (and only eat a small amount when I do crave it) which is nice and normally stick to dried fruit as my major craving. She said something along the lines of well maybe you just hit a growth spurt and it will even out. By this time though the damage was already done and all I wanted to do was crawl into a ball and cry.

So next my doctor came in and after we discussed everything else I asked about the weight gain. He told me that I was doing everything right and that every pregnancy is different. As long as I’m not eating junk food every day and just maintain a healthy lifestyle I will gain the weight that I am supposed to. So as reassured as this makes me I can’t help but still wonder if I’m doing the right things. Then after W got back I collapsed in tears. I just completely had a melt down and cried for a good 5 or 10 minutes. I know its hard for him to see me that upset about something but he understands that my weight is a sensitive issue and being told by a nurse that I gained too much really hit me hard. He tried his best to let me completely soak his the shoulder of his shirt with tears and calm me down. The truth of it was I just needed to cry and get it out and I think he of all people understands that.

So now I have a month to look forward to with 2 kids. W went out to get Mac from Sacramento for a month and after a long travel ordeal that I’m sure he will be blogging about later.