The big news!

If you’ve been following this blog for about the past 6 months to a year you know I’ve posted many things about how unhappy I am at my current job. 2 different bosses and still things continue to go downhill. I’ve even recently been demoted within my group simply due to my age and inexperience with Catia V4.

Also I’ve made it no secret that I’ve been looking for a new job. After the last round of random layoffs in my office that search got put into high gear. I’ve thrown out resumes to places all over town with no luck. Then I started applying to jobs out of state. Specifically up in Washington where there seemed to be a lot of engineering openings. The first job that I was considered for I  got to the second round of interviews  but got rejected. This is about the point that W and I started getting down about things.

Then I applied to another job opening at the same company and got asked to attend a job fair in Seattle WA. So I made arrangements and went up there thinking that this was just the first step in a long interview process. After a delay at the hotel I got to my interview right on time and as soon as I sat down was told that I would be told that day if I got the job or not.

The interview went well but I felt like I struggled with a couple of questions. I felt good about it but my nerves were shot after the hour long interview. Then came the hard part; waiting to find out if I got the job or not. After about 45 minutes of waiting I was finally called back. I got the job!!! I was told the job offer would come within 3 weeks and then I would get my start date and the exact location of where I would be working. I immediately called W and shared the news. To say he was floored was a complete understatement. What we had been working so hard for was starting to pan out!

The official offer letter came on Monday to our amazement. The letter contained a few details and confirmed that I will be working in Everett WA. Since then we have been busy looking at places to live and talking too many of W’s old friends about the area. We have also told our immediate family. Some have taken it better than others which we expected but everyone knows we are doing this for us and nothing else.

Since getting the official offer its been a whirlwind of things going on. We've been looking at apartments and I've been doing all of the standard pre-employment things. We are contacting friends in the area that might be able to help us. I should be contacted by the relocation office once my background check is complete which we expect to be here soon.

So that's the big news. We are officially moving out west sometime in February!

To Butters after a long month

It’s come to me to write something to Butters. One day I'll be able to explain all of what is going on to him but for now it will reside here.


Dear Butters,

The past month has been really rough. We started out just thinking you were having a little problem speaking but it turns out things were much worse. Most nights when you go to bed it all hits me. How hard we have been working with you and how hard you are trying. Your dad and I struggle to understand you and make sure that we are not being too hard on you while still making sure that we push you to talk and act correctly.

I was one of the worst people though. I kept saying that you were just a normal 3 year old boy. You didn’t talk too much because in all honesty you didn’t need to. You are very much like your dad in that at times you are just quiet. You’ve always been outgoing in your own way and over time we have just learned that your interactions with people are just your own.

Over the last few weeks we have learned that you have been having seizures. There are drop or atonic seizures that only last for a few seconds. You never seem very phased by them and for so long we just thought you were clumsy like I am. The day of your occupational therapy evaluation when we found out about the seizures I just felt horrible. I of course beat myself up for not understanding that these things were not normal.

Over the next weeks and months there will be more tests. There will be changes in your routine that are going to throw you off of your norm. All I know is that even this process is going to be challenging it will get better. We will be going back to see hockey games once the team gets back in town. I promise you that. I also promise that once all this maddess of testing is over you will be able to start playing sports with other kids.

We will continue to let you see numbers and be completely amazed by your abilities. You learn in a very unique way and while it may be more difficult for you to understand things that other kids do so easily trust me it will come. Just trust me that your dad, sisters and I will do everything we can to make things easier for you to understand.

One thing I can tell you is that you surprise me every day. You are amazing in the unique way you see things. No matter what the end diagnosis is you are still you. At times you drive us mad with your unique ways and others completely surprise us with the things you have absorbed. At this time I know no other 3.5 year old that knows about half of the UAH hockey roster!

Just know that no madder what we love you and will be here through all of this.

Love,

Mom

Another week and more news

So this was quite an eventful week. It started out with taking Alvin to a trial class at the Little Gym. It started out well enough but about half way through I started wondering if it was right for him. I had to go in and assist the teachers to control him when they broke out into stations. He screamed and cried thinking he was in trouble. By the end of it all I saw him struggle heavily to interact with other kids. He wanted to so bad at times but just couldn't figure out how to. The teachers suggested that I bring him back on Wednesday night due to that night being a smaller and calmer class.

Tuesday morning at work I got the call that the occupational therapist had an opening that afternoon. I dropped everything at work and made it home shortly after lunch to get him and head to the hospital for the evaluation. The team (one occupational therapist and one master's student) were wonderful with him. Within 15 minutes they knew what was going on with him. We went through some exercises and other things that would help him including using a plastic bristled brush to calm him. Once during the evaluation Alvin was sitting in a seat and suddenly slumped over then popped right back up. This immediately caught the therapists eye. She asked me if he had done that before and I said yes. He is 3 so of course he's clumsy. Well apparently this is not just him being clumsy and its called a drop seizure. She wasn't overly concerned but said we should go ahead and consult with our pediatrician.

So the next morning I got on the phone with the pediatrician's office and we got an appointment at 11 that morning. I discussed everything that happened and he came to the same conclusion that the occupational therapist did. He wants him to have an EEG on the 18th just to rule out anything else with the drop seizures. He reassured us that this was something that is very hard to spot in a kid of his age. 3 year olds are inherently clumsy and drop seizures can be very hard to spot.

On Thursday he had is first speech appointment with his new therapist and he did great. He was taken away to a seperate room and after 10 or 15 minutes he warmed up to her and finished strong. When we left he was happy and had a sense that he accomplished something that day.

So right now we have had 3 professionals tell us the same thing. So right now I'm about 90% confident with what we know. Right now we think Alvin has Asperger's syndrome. Basically its a form of autism where the person or child has a high level of functioning and a high level of intellect but have a hard time socializing. W and I are actually taking it pretty well. We have our moments when we break down and wish we didn't have to worry so much about therapy. We now approach Alvin slightly different. We work with him as much as possible and and make sure we are handling the situations appropriately given what we now understand about him.

This next week we continue the process. I'm meeting with a psychologist tomorrow to discuss his case and when he can be tested. Tuesday we go back to the occupational therapist and Thursday we go back to the speech therapist.

For a while this is just the way its going to be for a while. Luckily everything we are doing right now is in hopes of getting a better diagnosis and preparing for the evaluation in January.

Another twist and turn

The past month or so has been a blur. I’ve been working on finding another job after figuring out that things in my group are just not going to get better. I’ve done everything I can and still things have gone downhill. I’ve been sending out resumes and applying for jobs both in and out of state. I even got as far as to a second interview with a company in the northwest and after dropping everything to get up there with a 48 hour notice I got the call on Tuesday and was told thanks but we decided to hire someone else.

During all this Elliot turned 1 and we had her birthday party. Everything went well and we got a few good shots of her smashing a cupcake and loving every bit of it.

The biggest impact on things we have been facing is a challenge with Butters. I’ve been in denial about it for some time but we finally got him tested by a speech pathologist and were not prepared for the results. We knew he was speech delayed and that since Elliot was born but not the degree we were told.

The basic diagnosis so far has been a severe delay in receptive and expressive language skills. Basically the test said that he is around the same place as a 1.5 year old with language and he is 3.5. When I read this it was like someone just knocked the wind right out of me.

Also her recommendations on how to start correcting things were quite drastic. She said that we need to take all of the things he loves (his cars, numbers, hockey ect) away from him. She suggested that the only tv he get to watch is educational programming. Well this is not the path we decided to take. We are working within limits and doing everything we can to encorage him to use more words together. Something as simple as saying “juice please” is a big deal and we are getting him to say it more and more.

The funny thing is that in the past couple of weeks Butter's has started to learn the UAH Hockey roster. His favorite thing is to say “Starting at left defense, #2 Ryan Burkholder”!

So what do we do now is the question I’ve gotten from a few people. Right now we are working like crazy to get him into the early intervention program at the elementary school we are zoned for. This is becoming challenging though because they can’t evaluate him until January 5^th. So in the mean time we are working like crazy to get another evaluation set up at the children’s hospital as well as social therapies started. The hospital has a therapy center for this kind of thing but first they have to evaluate him for speech and occupational delays.

Luckily since beginning this post I was put in contact with a speech pathologist that works primarily with preschool aged kids. The therapist I got to talk to on the phone was really wonderful. They just ask that I bring a copy of the initial test results and give it a shot. She recommended that we try a couple of sessions then if he doesn't take to her then maybe we could try someone else.

I’m also looking into starting him in a structured athletic activities. The Little Gym has a preschool program and we are going for a trial class Monday night to see how he has responded. I’ve also contacted several other gyms about their classes trying to find the best fit for him.

So this is the point we are at now. We are doing our best to get things started but it’s a very slow process.

Wordless Wednesday

Photo courtesy of Will Nickelson

I'm late posting this but the birthday girl enjoying her cupcake! She turned 1 on October 5th.

My take on babywearing

After seeing a lot of posts on twitter and facebook about the recent baby carrier recalls I realized that while I have been doing quite a bit of baby/toddler wearing since Alvin was born but I've never really talked about it here.

I started out when Alvin was about 3 months old. I had a Jeep front carrier and quickly realized that it wasn't working well. Then I went searching for another and found the mei tai. I wore it with Alvin all the time. It was my best friend and hockey games and I used it in any weather for about 3 years.

Taking a ride in a backpack carry.

When Elliot was born things changed. I had already received a ring sling as a gift and was prepared to use it. Then I found a fleece pouch sling on clearance. This was the answer to what I would need to get through the next few months of hockey season with a infant and 2 year old. The sling worked wonders for us all season long. I managed to nurse in it when needed and juggle both kids and their needs with ease.

Napping in her peanut shell before a hockey game.

During the middle of the game her bottom is still in the sling and she knocked out.

As the kids have grown the way I carry them as also grown. Now I primarily use my Ergo carrier. Its a quick on and off and also easy to nurse discreetly in when needed. I can walk around for hours and not need to readjust or mess with it once its on.

In her normal spot getting ready to go inside for a hockey game.

Sleeping in the Ergo during the middle of a college hockey game.

I have gotten a lot of comments over the years regarding how I wear them, why and what carriers they are. Every time they ask where I got one I refer them to a local shop and advise them to bring their child with them and get help with getting fitted for the right one. I am a big supporter of baby wearing but I also advise people to get the appropriate help when choosing one.

My carriers though have gotten us through sleepless nights when motion was the only thing that helped them. Its given us the ability to walk around museums, malls and other crowded places without needing to break out the stroller. But above all else its given me closeness with my kids. The time I have spent with both of them strapped to me has let me get to know them both in different ways. I got to know their personalities and it allowed them to be very social in situations that I never would have imagined.

Elliot 11 months

Part of me can't believe that she is almost a year old. The past week I have begun planning her birthday party next month and I think I am about ready! Over the past couple of months she has gone from crawling slowly to being able to go rather fast. She is at least 24 lbs now and really doesn't like it when we try and feed her anything. She is definitely an independent feeder and would prefer us to give her cut up pieces of meat, fruits and vegetables rather than us feed her anything.

She is also cruising using on all the walls and furniture. Alvin has also learned to keep his snacks and drinks out of her reach since she will eat anything within her reach. She loves to say ma and ba.She recently discovered how to roll a ball back and forth. Around the house she has become very aware of Alvin and follows him around like a puppy some days. When he is around all she wants to do is play with him

The other night we got home from running some errands and she found one of Alvin's hockey sticks and a puck and started trying to hit it. The cutest thing was when I picked her up to let her practice walking she refused to let go and wanted to carry the stick with her! I guess our love of hockey is starting to wear off on her. I just wish I could have gotten a picture!

Luckily for all of us here the start of college football season means college hockey season isn't far off! We will be going to our first game on October 7th and 8th and we can't wait. This will be the first year that she will be able to really start watching and I can't wait to see how she reacts to watching warm ups.

And now for the pictures:

After the Swim For Melissa. This was the smallest shirt they had and it swallows her!

Battling cranberries for dinner. She didn't care she was a mess and had so much fun!

Here have some pasta.

Swinging at the park.

College football game day. Complete with the hounds tooth bow.

Roll Tide!